I haven’t had a real Chick sighting since my appendix was removed.
There have been, you know, moments when I walk by his condo and see the blinds move slightly, and a moment a few months ago when he was unlocking his door and I waved as he stared. Oh, and when I came back from the hospital after having my appendix removed, I noted a stickey on my door that said I had flowers, but since I wasn’t home, that they were delivered to my neighbor. I knocked on Chick’s door, but there was no response. I went back home and just as I drove the deadbolt through, there was a knock at my door. Strange, no one showed through the peep hole. I opened the door, and there were my flowers, but no Chick. He must have scurried away.
So there has really been no significant contact since the last Chick incident.
6:20 am. I was out walking Buddy the Immortal, as I always do. You know I’m a bit paranoid (from reading too many Zodiac serial killer John Douglas Forensic Files books) and I occasionally change up my routine so it’s not so routine. I like to thwart serial killers stalking my route, so they can’t kill and dismember me leaving only the DNA from my teeth to identify my charred remains.
My imagination is colorful. The color is blood red, but still, it’s colorful.
So I varied my walking route this week. I think it’s good for Buddy too – then he doesn’t get tired of all the same old smells. And smell he does - Buddy likes to sniff! It’s really all he has left after 17 good years - he can’t see so well, he can’t hear much, and he’s got stiff old bones. He spends a lot of time sniffing around, seeing what’s what ~ it’s his final joy and I don’t like to rush him.
Buddy decided to spend a little time sniffing Chick’s “lawn”. The 10’x10’ slice of heaven that ever he’s tending. As I waited for Buddy to reach his conclusions about the scented patch he was working on, I heard Chick’s door open.
“Mind getting your dog off my lawn?”
Understand, that there was a time in my life that any confrontation made me feel like a bad girl and I would noiselessly comply. That time is over.
“Why? He’s just sniffing.”
“BECAUSE I DON’T WANT YOUR DOG SHITTING ALL OVER MY LAWN!”
“HE’S. NOT. SHITTING. HE’S. SNIFFING.”
We stared each other down for a beat of three seconds. I could hear the music of a thousand western high noon stand offs in my head.
I didn’t back down. I was the bigger person. I still think that creep has a bunker hewn out of concrete in his condo and I don’t want my daughter or I to become a tenant in it. Discretion, better part of valor, all that.
“But yeah,” I said, “I’ll get him off your lawn.” Buddy and I moved away.
As I prayed some of my regular prayers later on, I realized I’m supposed to try to see Christ in Chick. OhhhhKayyyyyy. Some times it’s harder than others.